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Friday, 19 July 2013

RFW ~ The Honeymoon Penny


THE BRIEF: Only for this challenge, RFW recognizes that not all honeymoon periods involve a wedding. The honeymoon could refer to that period after taking a platonic relationship to its next logical step; the phase in the DV cycle where the abuser is wooing back into the victim's good graces; that period of adjustment when blended families attempt to get along; the getting to know you phase after a promotion (who's the cutie in the next cubbie keeps making the "come here" eyes?); a relocation to a new city (who's the hottie lounging by the pool or mowing the lawn every other week?)
For writers of more contemporary or darker commitments: that period of blissful adjustment after being bitten by a shifter or vamp, feeling the relief after a bad break-up, the thrill of quitting a go-nowhere job.


Whatever the circumstances of the Honeymoon ritual, be sure to add some romance to the exuberant feeling of "the right decision"; even if the feeling is only a few moments, a few hours, or a few months. Honeymoons are essentially a celebration of a long anticipated decision come to fruition. Any genre or POV, prose or poetry, fiction or non-fiction, up to 1000 words. The linky will be open from July 19 thru July 22.  Be sure to link your DIRECT POST, and add the undertone of romance to whatever Honeymoon situation you create. Have fun!

Okay, so here's mine:

The Honeymoon Penny  by Madeleine Sara

For Eleanor, it seemed the penny had yet to drop, for she was still in that blissful honeymoon period, where she could dismiss all of Tony’s little quirks as something she could iron out of him in time. Though she knew only too well that she must have some faults and foibles of own that he must surely overlook. Tonight, she thought excitedly, she and Tony would be dining at Carson’s, the posh restaurant on the high street, to mark their first year together. She stood gliding the iron over his seventh shirt, while listening to ‘Breathless’ on her iPod and imagining herself in the soft, pink gown she had chosen for the occasion, that complimented her complexion. Her thoughts then wandered to an image of Tony, changing into his best suit for the evening. There was no denying he had a super, gorgeous body and a cheeky smile that lit up his dark brown eyes, enough to melt any woman’s resolve. An intoxicating flutter darted from Eleanor’s stomach to her heart, settling as a yearning ache further down inside her. It thrilled her that Tony’s eyes only lit up at the sight of her and that he had chosen her to be his girlfriend, above all others. She dreamed that one day, he might even get down on one knee and ask her to marry him. Their children would be gorgeous, too.

 Eleanor hung the freshly ironed shirts in the wardrobe, remembering how she and Tony had met on a cold wet evening. Tony had been the only one not to hurry past her, but instead helped pick up and carry her shopping, when the bags had split. Such a gallant gesture from his knight to her damsel in distress.

As the music track changed to ‘Forgiven, Not Forgotten’, she bent down to pick up yet another pair of socks that he had discarded, smiling to herself. She remembered how her dad had done just the same thing; so her mother had stuffed each one into his pillow case until the whole thing became as ripe as a piece of Gorgonzola. She glanced at the clock on the bedside table and hurried into the shower. Tony would be home soon and she needed to get ready.

Later that evening, in the restaurant, Tony held her gaze as he clasped her hand in his own. Then he started fumbling distractedly in his pocket with his other hand, making her recall how he rarely used a handkerchief, preferring to sniff incessantly when he had a cold. The thought dissolved when Tony began to unfurl her fingers like a blossoming flower and placed a small, velvet box on her palm.

“Marry me” he whispered, his eyes glinting with love for her.

Trembling like a petal in the breeze, she opened the box to find a large, ornate engagement ring glaring defiantly up at her. From the look of it, this must have cost a pretty penny! She bit her lip with tears in her eyes, wondering how she could live with such an ugly piece of jewellery on her hand; yet knowing she could never live without her Tony.

“Yes, I will” she breathed back, leaning forward to consummate their vow with a kiss, with Rachmaninoff's piano concerto No2. playing quietly in the background.

(550 words)

Does this press your romance buttons?
You may give full feed back on this submission. Thank you

Oh and don't forget to visit Medeia's blog. She's having a fab blogversary giveaway..

24 comments:

  1. Hi Madeleine .. I thought it might have a 'horrid' ending .. but no - all was very well.

    Fun read ... she sounds happy .. cheers and enjoy this weather - being by the sea at least gives us a cool breeze ..

    Cheers Hilary

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  2. Thanks Hilary. I like your new avatar. Yes I am loving the sunshine :O)

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  3. Hi Madeleine, I was expecting a twist in the tale but thankfully it ended well.

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  4. LOL! yes Rachna, her love is blinded by those rose tinted spectacles. Hope you enjoyed it ;O)

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  5. Well done Madeleine. I suspect his pillow will end up like her father's one day.
    Nancy

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    1. LOL! Absolutely! I'm afraid I found your comment belatedly, under spam !

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  6. Marriage to a man who sniffs incessantly doesn't auger well, lol. I love how you've incorporated music Maddy. Really added another level to the drudgery of ironing those 7 shirts. It is definitely romantic, and your heroine is getting who/what she wants.

    Thanks for taking the time to write for RFW again. We have missed you.

    Denise

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  7. I really enjoyed your story, Madeleine. It ended well and I loved the music. x

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  8. I loved the way you lead us in with the ironing, physically and hoping she could iron out his foibles. The ring, glaring defiantly up at her, the little adjustments she will have to make to their life together - as did her mother. Great story.

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  9. LOL!Denise, yes and thank you. And I'm pleased you noted the music, too :O)

    Joanna & Sally, bless you both, thanks. So glad you enjoyed my flash story.

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  10. I think there's going to be trouble ahead - she already wants to change his little quirks and is annoyed with his sniffing. That doesn't mean it won't work out, but that I expect some conflict before the next honeymoon phase.

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  11. The euphoric feeling ends around year two and that's when their relationship will really develop. And be tested.

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  12. Always enjoy your characterization, Madeleine. Nice work.

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  13. Patsy and Diane, yes there may be trouble ahead (as the song goes) but maybe not.:O)

    Bless you Milo, thank you for your feedback that is very much appreciated.

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  14. HaHa! That honeymoon period looks it may end quicker than she thinks. Fun read.

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  15. Nice!

    Our honeymoon's lasted 35 years and counting. :)


    Madeleine Begun Kane

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  16. Awwwww Madeleine!!! This totally presses my most romantic honeymoon period buttons! I love the metaphor of the act of ironing - and ironing out in the future - Tony's things and foibles! Brilliant!! Take care
    x

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  17. Vivid characters Maddy. There is a lot of story here that lingers after the read. I love speculating on what happens between the lines.

    This couple sounds sweet, and devoted to each other. The tender looks, the comfortable feel in the relationship, the obvious love. Definitely in the honeymoon phase of the relationship. Love the way you captured the theme with the mundane to the fancy.

    That was an interesting choice for background music. It has an ominous undertone, kinda nervous and jittery, then smoothes out and flares again; but it definitely fits the emotional theme of your MC. And works well with the voice.

    Well done. Thanks for participating with RFW this month Maddy.

    ......dhole

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  18. A sweet romance with an undertone of something unexpected about to happen that does not get told. You left us wondering what would happen to these two.

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  19. Scheherazade thank you for stopping by to comment.

    Thank you, Donna, for your thorough critique, much appreciated. So glad you enjoyed it.

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  20. Old Kitty, Bless you, too! Thanks

    LOL! Theresa, yes!
    Incredible Madeleine :O)

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  21. I love the way you included the quirks, we all have them, and I'd hate to hear a list of my own. :)

    But love does conquer it all! Great story. I missed posting for this one, but love making the rounds!

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  22. Great little story that blends romantic elements with everyday details. Nobody's perfect!

    Nice contemporary take on the honeymoon theme. The happy end was a pleasant surprise. Love the line about her not liking the ring he chose; it does make me wonder how long this relationship will last though.

    Well done Madeleine!

    Best wishes,
    Anna
    Anna's RFW Challenge for July: Honeymoon

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  23. Yolanda, thank you, glad you enjoyed it.

    Anna, thank you. :O)

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